boy what a weekend!!

So we went away for the weekend to Cardiff as it was our annual Jehovah’s witness 3 day assembly.
But I tell you something I have never been away and had it be marred with so many things!!

Take Wednesday for instance, hubby came back from work hobbling…ended up going to A+E with a possible fractured leg!! Thankfully though it wasn’t broken…just crutch requirements!
Although before he went to hospital the car wouldn’t start…
The thing about the assembly is that you can guarantee that Satan will test your faith and love for Jehovah, and I wasn’t about to let him beat me!
We traveled down to our hotel on Thursday lunchtime, got there at a reasonable hour and went out for dinner.
Put the kids to bed…at 10pm Ariana started being sick…then bella at 3am…now for those who don’t know I have a huge fear of sick…the thought…the sound…so I started panicking and I abandoned matt and took James to the lobby. I came back to the room at 6am. Ariana was ok. Bella was not.
Unfortunately hubby and I exchanged a few tense words…
I went to the bathroom and collapsed.
So I ended up taking a trip to hospital!
At this point a lesser person may have given up and gone back home..
But I will not be beaten.

Come Saturday everything seemed to be getting better, and we managed to last the whole day at the assembly… Even though James wasn’t feeling himself.
Sunday was even better, and it was the most wonderful, emotional day!
Another thing about the assembly is it is really up building and you leave feeling so good.

After the weekend got better and we got back home hubby got sick and James did too.
But I am remaining positive 🙂

Hope your weekend was better 🙂

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6 week old little man

A happier post for today you will be pleased to know.

Little man James had his 6 week check today.
All is great!!
He is 10lb 15oz in weight and is above average in length..90% centile!! So I am going to have a tall little boy by the sound a of it.
I wouldn’t mind so much, but I am only 5ft 3in!
Ah well what can you do.
I have got my first few smiles out of him in the last few days, you forget how cute and innocent babies are 🙂
He is such a handsome boy, and so far doing pretty good sleep wise…so far..

depression is an illness

I realise it has been a while since I posted anything on here so please accept my apologies.

Today I want to talk about something very important that I feel is a problem for many people around the world.

Depression.

Any kind of depression is crippling.
Currently I am struggling with some pretty severe post natal depression. Now normally I don’t talk about how I feel and it tends to be to my detriment. But after spending most of my morning in floods of tears on the phone to my health visitor. I came to the conclusion that people need to be made aware of what it does to a person.
The first thing she asked me was – do you want to hurt your kids? Answer – no
Second thing – do you want to hurt yourself?
Answer – yes.

Now you may read this and think I am selfish.
But thoughts are very powerful.
Sometimes so powerful that mums have gone to the point of suicide. But I thought if I didn’t pick up the phone this morning and speak to someone I would regret it.
I know there arw women out there like me that try so hard to make everyone think we can cope. Covering our feelings with a cleverly placed mask of joy. But inside we are feeling like a black hole of pain and anguish.
But I beg of you talk to someone, a friend, a loved one…do what I did and write an email to a friend so you don’t have to talk through floods of tears.
But you must, must, must get help with your emotions.

If you so wish tell people about my blog post and I will try to help anyone I can. Why should we mums suffer alone?
Be an ambassador for post natal depression if you like.

But please don’t feel you are alone.
Harder to do than say I know!

Much love

Charlotte x