…..hands up who is having a bad day?
…..hands up who let negative thoughts win out
…..hands up who is feeling positive today?
I bet like me most of you agree to the top 2 right?
Well let’s see if we can’t change that eh?!
I am feeling a change of the wind!
You all know I am in introvert, its nothing new.
But today I went right back to being a 6 year old.
I went to pick up my oldest from school and I stood in the playground, talked to no one and played with my jumper.
In my head I was shouting out what are you doing? You are a 28 year old woman! GET A GRIP!
My stupid walls went up and I hid behind them like a cowering child!
Why? Why do I fear people I don’t know when I see them face to face?
It doesn’t seem right that I am more comfortable writing words on my blog under the assumption that its like a diary…that people read.
But I can’t help being who I am I guess.
Sometimes I wish that I was more open, more chatty, more confident.
But I came to a realisation yesterday when having a discussion about personality types on #fireworkpeople Facebook group.
A fellow ISFJ asked how others with the same type personality felt – and me being me showered her with positive thoughts and outlooks. I even found a quote that if it isn’t talking about me then I am a monkeys uncle…or aunty!
“ISFJ’s are true altruists meeting kindness with kindness in excess”
This is what I do. I can’t be positive about myself. But I will darn well make someone feel good about themselves.
I refuse to hear/watch/see people hurting.
I will do everything in my power to help them.
A listening ear
The words ‘it’ll be ok’ go a surprisingly long way.
Why I am not so good to myself?
That’s an excellent question
I can’t say.
I sometimes feel that I am here to help others with my openness in my words.
I may not be open in person
But boy can I express my feelings with writing.
That’s one thing you can count on from me, no matter how poopy my day is I can still write my heart out.
It makes me feel better sometimes just to get my emotions out in the only way I feel comfortable doing so.
This is what I need to instill in my own life.
To be positive
I am so good at being awful to myself
I may be falling apart and my heart full of scars from my past and present.
But I do I make my future seem to head the same way?
Why do I send myself out there and say go ahead darkness take me?
What I should say is up yours darkness! You can never have me, no matter how broken I am!
Today I decided I am going to write down my feelings, my quotes my words in a book.
I started writing a song today!
Perhaps writing positive things is my forte?!
So I want to be a star in all the right ways.
I can shine through the darkness, and overcome
I can be a shining light for someone else
I am slowly coming to terms with the person I am
The person with many different scars, physical and metaphorical
The person who has suffered
The person who’s dad died doing what he knew to be the right thing.
But if I was in the same position I would do the same thing
This doesn’t define me
This makes me stronger
The person who is not going be a skinny lady no matter how hard she tries.
The red head and proud baby!!
My freckles are my unique mark, making me stand out for all the right reasons.
So I am not confident in person! Big woop!
Does that make me different?
Yup and I like that way!
The more I write about myself the more I like these things.
So let’s think positive
Let’s send out love to those who need it today.
Be your own shining star 💖
Be your own beacon of light.
We don’t need to prove our worth to anyone.
We are enough without the approval of others.
Be the best you that you can be. Everyday.
I know I will, starting today.