FMF – Quiet

Evening!

It’s that time of the week again…fri-yay 😊
Before I get started I thought you might like to see how miss Ariana looks in her new glasses –

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To be honest I thought she would be constantly whipping them off her face, but so far they have remained where I put them.
Which makes me think the must be helping her 😊 she has been so good through all of this. My big girl.

As you know, I am joining in with five minute Friday – my favourite part of the week where we have five minutes of free writing.
Make sure to check out kate and her linkup

This weeks prompt is – Quiet

Ready, set, go

Those of you who are regular readers of my blog will know I am an introvert.

I enjoy quiet, in fact most of the time I need it.
Which is kind of tricky when you have 3 children under 6.

I have to make sure they all go to bed at the same time, because I need time alone.
I am aware of how selfish this sounds – but those of us who are introverts will know exactly how I feel.

It’s hard enough being in groups of people, but when you add too much noise to the mix it can sometimes tip me over the edge.

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I just need moments to step back and just be quiet, you know?!

But in the quiet of the night I can quietly reflect, and switch my brain off – silencing my thoughts.

Because there is quiet and then there is qquuiieett 😊 extra letters mean extra quiet.

Right now it’s 19.30pm and the kids are in bed.

Which means its my quiet time 😊

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School run mums

It’s been a long time since I wrote a blog post from the point of view of being mum.

But I feel this needs to be said.

Just the other day I read an article online, about a head teacher at a school in England.
She sent a letter home to parents, asking them to please not drop their children off at school whilst wearing their pyjamas and slippers in order to set an example to pupils.

I don’t think this was unreasonable.

However, there was one mum who decided to defy the request..and hey-ho got a headline story in the news today – read more

Now as a mum of 3 I know how stressful and rushy (its a word) the morning routine is.
I have 3 kids to feed and get dress on a morning, and yet I still manage to stick on a paid of jeans and a jumper.

This is mainly due to the fact that I just can’t bring myself to wear my nightwear out in public – I still find the whole onesie wearing phenomenon a head scratcher.

I completely understand that the morning is a busy time, but I also think that putting on clothes before leaving the house sets a good example to our kids.

I think it a little bit hypocritical of me to preach one thing to my kids and doing the opposite.

With that in mind I decided to find some of my favourite outfits that I can get inspiration from for future school runs.

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I especially love the pink outfit!

Short and sweet today 😊

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T@T – embrace

It’s Friday!!
Who’s got that Friday feeling?

Before I forget I wanted to update you all on Ariana.
She had her appointment with the ophthalmologist this week.
It would appear she is extremely long sighted and requires very strong lensed glasses.

She had a lot of fun trying glasses on…she was like these are perfect!
The trick is going to be keeping the darn things on her face 😊
I am just glad that we can now start to sort out the problem, yay!

I am playing a little catch up and joining in with Karen and her linkup

This weeks word resonates with his I am feeling this week.

Embrace.

When I think of this word – hugs spring to mind.
That comforting feeling of an embrace.

However, this is not the direction I am choosing today.

I want you stand in front of your mirror.
Take a good look at yourself.

Do you see yourself?
Do you see you?

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I say this often I know 😊 but I hope the more I say it, the more you will start to do it…repetitiveness is the key!

Embracing who you are is so important in the world today.
After my post on body shaming the other day – it seems to me that there is so much pressure put on not only women but men to fit the mold.
We are shown images of models or celebrities in magazines – and they are portrayed as the body that everyone should have.
Tight abs, thigh gaps…which makes us feel inferior.

But I don’t know about you but I am tired of feeling inferior, of being considered overweight and not caring about my appearance.
I am tired of the body shaming that goes on.
I am tired of looking in the mirror and pointing out my flaws and never feeling good enough.

I am embracing embracing (no its not a typo!)my body.
Because do you know what – its not about being skinny or overweight – its about being healthy and happy.
It’s about feeling good in my own skin.

I am Charlotte, I am creeping up to being 30.
I had my son nearly 2 years ago and I haven’t lost my baby weight – and that is OK.
I am embracing who I am.

I am a mum.
I workout but not to lose weight, but to be healthy.
I like to eat, I like food.
My thighs touch and my stomach has stretch marks.

But I like it.
I am embracing me.

We all need to embrace who we are and not feel we need to change for other people.

You are amazing and individual, embrace that!

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Body shaming = bullying

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*Warning* I may rant.

Alright, so you all know that I struggle with body image, and my weight.
Up until now I have managed to avoid being shamed out in public.

However yesterday this changed.
I was out with my family, spending time at the park.
I decided to play on the swings with Bella.
Whilst on it I was told ‘the bar is bending in the middle with you on there’
I was crushed.
I felt broken and hurt.
I immediately hopped off of the swing and hid myself away.
I had gone from having an enjoyable time, to feeling incredibly self conscious.

Yesterday I felt saddened by these underhanded comments.
Today I am angry about them.

First off, I am not going to stand here and make excuses for how I look.
It is my body.

I don’t agree with any kind of shaming, and nowadays shaming is rife.
Fat shaming
Skinny shaming
Mum shaming.. The list goes on

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Consider how your words will make a person feel about themselves.
It is so easy to have and give an opinion on a persons appearance, but your words are damaging.

The fact that someone felt the need to call me out on my weight is hurtful.
I thought I had left the bullies back in highschool, turns out I was wrong.

As I write this I decided to reach out to my friend, body positive role model and fellow anti body shame – Anastasia for her thoughts on this subject.
I was going to paraphrase this, but it is too important a message to shorten – here is what she had to say –

“Whichever way you look at it, body shaming is bullying. There are some sad individuals who choose to argue that not being able to comment on someone’s body without them getting offended is “taking political correctness too far” but from my perspective, this is an issue of human compassion, not politics.

There is a vast difference between free speech and consequence-free speech, which many people sadly forget. I have no sympathy for those who so callously invalidate the experiences of others to be “funny” and I have no sympathy for those who think it’s acceptable to bully others. And despite what some bullies will tell you, their hateful remarks are in no way reflective of genuine concern for someone’s health or wellbeing.

Bullying, of any kind, is NOT OKAY. It’s not okay to bully fat people. It’s not okay to bully thin people. It’s not okay to bully very athletic people or curvy people or disabled people or any other person based on their physical form. Whatever size you are, you don’t deserve to be shamed for your body. You don’t deserve to be shamed for trying to get healthy in a way that makes sense to you. You don’t deserve to be shamed for trying to achieve a level of contentment with yourself along the way to health. You don’t deserve to be shamed for having a body, even if you choose not to take care of it. You don’t deserve to be shamed. Full stop.

Studies are showing time and time again that shaming and bullying results in low self-esteem which is likely to reinforce negative behaviours around food and exercise. So contrary to what some bullies will tell you, shaming a fat person won’t suddenly “inspire” them to see the error of their ways, nor will it “motivate” a thin person to start eating differently. In fact, you’re more likely to push them away from any notions of health or seeking help for concerns they may have about their wellbeing.

And besides, as a stranger, it’s not your place to comment on someone’s body. Even if you think your X-Ray vision can see their diabetes or low blood pressure or lactose intolerance of otherwise… unless you’re their doctor (in which case, you’d likely have far more tact than to bully someone anyway), it’s none of your business.

Fat shaming, skinny shaming – it’s all the same. Bullying and harassment. And it’s never acceptable under any circumstances.”
– Anastasia Amour

I literally agree with every word she said here.

People think it is there given right to say what they think.

They may think they are helping you out, but it is not helpful.
It is bullying.

When you give your opinion on a person body type or on how they look, you are damaging their self esteem.

When you tease or ‘joke’ about their weight, you ebb away that their confidence.

Your opinion can cause them to stop eating, to take extreme measures to change their appearance.
To become more ‘pleasing’ to society’s view of perfection.

Your personal opinion, has broken that persons self love.

I will say it again – body shaming is bullying

We are not born hating our bodies.

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Others opinions, comments and the media feed how we feel about ourselves.
They are the fuel to the fire underneath how feel about our bodies.

But I tell you something I am going to be the fire extinguisher to that fire.
I will not let it burn so much that it takes over me.

Your words are not so much inspiring, but hurtful.

Stop body shaming.
Stop bullying.

Don’t be ashamed of how you look.
Don’t let others make you feel badly about yourself.

You are beautiful.

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FMF – time

Happy weekend!
Which give or take a screaming child or two it had been 😊

I am going to dive straight in to this weeks five minute Friday..as
a. its Saturday and B. It’s 9.30pm
Oops! So much for doing it on Friday this week eh!

Anywho, you all know the drill by now – I am joining in on five minutes of free writing with Kate and her linkup

This weeks prompt is – Time

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24 hours or 1440 minutes in a day (yes I googled that!)

We are a diverse group here, from many different places – but i can guarantee most of us will spend our time working or taking care of families.
Doing laundry or dishes.
Driving places or sitting on the bus.
Making dinner or buying groceries.

But what we don’t realise is how precious time is.
It is fleeting and borrowed.

We wake each day and think of each menial task that will fill out the day, making time fly by.

But when we turn on the news and see headlines full of violence, murder, plane crashes and death – it makes you understand more how precious the time that we have is.

In a moment your life can change
You don’t realise how precious it is until it is a memory.

My time spent with my dad was minimal.
It was what seemed like mere moments and then he was gone

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Now all I have is memories and a few photographs.

Which could be why I spend a lot of my time taking photos, making memories I can keep and look back on.

So I guess I use my time to put my time into making polaroid moments.

I have discovered from a young age just how precious life and time is.
Time is something we are given, a gift.

We don’t know how much time we have been given, so we must make the most of the time we have now.

Each day we wake is a gift.
It is time we make good use of the time we have been given.

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Time is precious.

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T@T – trust

So it has been a stunningly bad week this week –

My anxiety levels are through the roof, I am struggling with my appearance on not only daily but nightly levels – yup I am dreaming about it now too.
The weather has gone from rain to snow in a matter of days..and Bella being her extra clumsy self, fell down some steps at school and got a black eye! 😒

All things considered I am lucky to be able to pull myself up, dust myself off and try to carry on.

Not to be completely full of sad news today – James is really coming along with his talking..although still lazy with the walking 😊 and Ariana will be starting preschool soon…time really flies by.

Oh and with news on her eyes, we have a second appointment with an eye doctor next week – to determine the severity of her visual impairment.. Finally!

Alrighty, on with this weeks Tuesday at ten.
As you know I am joining in with Karen and the linkup

This weeks prompt is trust

Trust.

A small word
A simple word
A powerful word

It is a word that by all accounts should be easy.
But many people struggle to withhold it.

In friendships you need trust to thrive.
When the trust is broken, friendships often go with if.

In relationships you need trust to survive.
Without it there is no relationship.

In day to day life you need to trust in yourself.
You need to trust in your strength and your abilities.

Trust in your ability to speak up and stand up for yourself.
Trust in your strength to be able to stand up for others.

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Know that you are good enough.
Trust that have strength in spades.
Know that you are braver than you know.
Trust in your instincts.
Know that you have courage.
Trust in yourself.

Others may break your trust, causing you to struggle with connecting with other people.
But do not break the connection between you and trust.

You may not feel if today..or tomorrow
But trust will never leave you.

When you decide something for yourself instead of following the crowd – that my dear is trusting in yourself.

When you feel anxious about going out alone – and yet you still go
That is trusting in yourself.

You trust that you can – you know that you can.

Maintain trust in yourself with little moments of bravery and personal strength.

Trust that you are amazing, because you are.
Trust that you can, because I believe you can.
Trust in yourself, because you are worthy of it.

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