FMF – weak

Yesterday was a pretty tough day.

It was 27 years since my dad passed away.

Every year that passes gets harder not easier. Yesterday was full of memories and flashbacks.

So I decided to push back five minute friday, because my brain and heart just weren’t up to the task.

I am still not feeling good today, but I am here all the same.

Ready and willing to write. Because sometimes…Ok most times writing helps.

As you know I am joining in with kate and her linkup of fab writers, for five minutes of free writing… Remember no editing!

This weeks prompt –

Ready, set, go
Well this word means a huge amount to me this week. I feel physically weak. Like I am missing some important part of my being.

My dad is missing from me. 

He has been gone for so long, but my heart feels like it is missing a piece.

My heart is weakened by the loss. Broken.

I may feel weak without him. But my dad was far from a weak man.

He was so strong. So brave. So courageous.

People will often ask me what happened.. Curiosity I guess.

I tell them he died a hero.

He wasn’t a police officer, a fireman or a paramedic.

He was a normal guy, who wanted to help someone in trouble.

He did and he saved lives. Because it was the kind of person he was.

He was a very brave man.

I feel positively weak in comparison.

Even now after all I have been through and put myself through.

But when I think hard about it and shed light on my past I realise that I am strong.

I am not as weak as I think I am.

When I am weak, then I am strong.


FMF – breathe

It’s Friday! 

And February…Wait what?! 

Ooh also we are heading back to France in august! Yay!

I think we may have found our new annual holiday destination, huzzah!

Hope your week has seen you well 😊 so far we have had an abundance of rain and gale force winds 👍 oh and I have done my back in again, which is always a joy 😔

Currently stuck in a constant of fighting colds and miserable weather.

Well, it’s Friday so that means it’s time for fmf. And yes this is me writing it on a Friday, shocking I know 😂 

As usual I am joining in with Kate and her linkup of wonderful writers. To take five minutes out of day to write on a prompt..No editing..No stopping..Eek!
This week’s prompt –

Ready. Set. Go

Tell me something.

Do you ever just stop. Step back, close your eyes and just breathe?

Yea me neither.

I am the last person that would do it. But you know what it so important, to just stop and take a breath.

Don’t get me wrong I don’t mean literal breathing, because I think we all know that’s important.

I mean taking a step back from life, from worries, from stresses.

Because so many of us have these troubles that we are buried under, that suffocate us – that we just need that time to step away.

That is how we can get through things.

Inhale. Exhale. Move forward.

If you feel like you struggling. Stop and breathe.

We cannot force our way through things like a bull in a China shop –

 Take things slow, take care, breathe.

Life is tough. If you don’t take care of you, then you may stumble and fall.

Sometimes I know I need to step back and breathe, but I don’t.

My heart feels it. My head knows it. But my body ignores it.

From now on I am going to pay more attention to me. I am going to take the time to stop.

I am going to take the time to breathe.

FMF – control

Oh my word I feel like the white rabbit almost every week at the moment…”I’m late, I’m late!” 😂

It’s not as if I forget, it’s more that it gets pushed out of my brain by the day to day life of being a parent 😂

Anyway I am going to get right to it, before something happens to distract me.

As you know I am joining in with kate and her linkup of lovely writers, for five minutes of free writing. Without going over it and editing..Eek!

This week’s prompt

Ready, set, go.

This is an interesting word for me.

Certain aspects of my life I have used as a form of control. 

Because sometimes when things go wrong we try to adjust by changing other areas of our lives – in order to try to gain control.

When I was younger I controlled my eating.

If you were to ask me if there was any trigger, I couldn’t give you an answer. Because I don’t really know myself.

One thing I do know is that I was so afraid of being sick that I just stopped eating. Which in turn spiralled out of control.

But the whole thing behind it I guess, is that of control.

Nobody likes to feel as though they have no control. It is one if the worst feelings.

As an example my husband hates rollercoasters – because he has no control over the speed etc.

I wouldn’t say I am a control freak, by any stretch of the imagination.

But I am a major stresser. I stress about little things, big things, things that haven’t even happened.

But we can’t control everything. Sometimes we just have to let it be. 

Take a deep breath. Have faith. And let go.

Turn off your control switch.

FMF – Connect

Its back.

The first five minute friday of 2017! This year I hope to do all of them.

Self care is my thing this year, taking time out do things I enjoy. And I enjoy blogging, writing down my thoughts, reading others…Etc..Etc..

So in the spirit of sticking to my word, here is my (albiet late) five minute friday post.

As usual I am joining in with kate and her linkup of lovely bloggers.

Taking 5 minutes out of our busy schedules to write on a given topic – no deleting, no editing..Eek!

This week’s prompt – connect

Ready, set, go.
We all want to connect with someone. It’s human nature.

As babies we connect with our parents. 

As children we try to connect with other children, to make friends.

As teenagers we try to connect with different peer groups, trying to fit in. To belong.

As adults, I think the same thing applies. It’s surprising how the work place is very much like high school.

But on some level we all want to connect.

Because let me tell you something being lonely sucks, it really sucks.

I told my mum something the other day about how hard it was for me in high school.

How I had a group of friends – 3 or 4. Most days they would be my friend, talk with me, sit with me in class etc.

But other days I would go to school only to find this was no long the case. Today they hated me. Today they would ignore me, blank me, point and laugh at me, openly mock me in class. Basically treat me like garbage.

All I ever wanted was a proper friend. Not one that treated me badly. Yet I let it happen over and over again.

Yet even though this is how people have treated me – I still long to connect.

Because when we connect with those who make us feel good, it builds us up.

Making us feel more worthy of friendship, of kindness.

Everybody deserves kindness. Deserves they can connect with, and talk to.

How do you feel when you connect with others?

Just one connection makes a difference.

FMF – joy

Well hello.

I took a little break away from writing for a few weeks – I felt a little lost, a little bit like I had lost my mojo.

So I took some time to reflect and try to rejuvenate myself.

Because sometimes it is important to take the time out for self care.
But I am back and hoping to not get stuck in a writing rut – 2016 has been tough year, in so many ways.

Roll on 2017…am I right?!

Here goes – five minute friday.

Joining in with kate and her linkup of lovely writers.

Taking five minutes to write on a prompt. No deleting. No editing.

This week’s word – joy
Ready, set, go.
Joy can be found everywhere. You just have to look.

The world is sometimes a really scary, dangerous place.

But there is also joy.

Joy in giving.

Joy in kindness and in love.

Joy in the ordinary.

Joy in happiness.

There is also joy in just showing up you know.

You can be your own joy, your own light.

Joy is a decision, a journey you choose.

Joy can be found in small moments, some you might not even notice at the time.

Joy is a blessing.

Joy is a joy.

Joy is a wonderful thing. 

Its an amazing feeling.

I sometimes struggle to find the joy. To hold onto it.

But I know that joy is there, I just have to grasp it.

We all need to find the joy in life.


FMF – journey

Do you know what? 

I wrote the title of this blog post on Friday and then poof! No ideas!

Literally couldn’t think of anything, it was incredibly frustrating.

I really hate having writers block…
But as I sit here with a glass of wine in my hand, with the kids in bed I think I got it 😊

Joining in with kate and her linkup of lovely bloggers for five minutes of free writing.

This week’s prompt is journey

Ready, set, go
Life is a journey.

Everyday is a new challenge.

But sometimes it’s easy to forget that life is a journey.

Often I will get stuck in a rut or get stressed out about the little things.

In fact I stress about the little things a lot.

For example trying to toilet train Ariana before she starts school has been a nightmare. A fist clenching, hair pulling nightmare.

It took months. Months of accidents, uti’s and poop fear.

Yes you read that right! Poop fear. So much so that she ended up constipated.

And during her toilet training journey I stupidly compared it with toilet training Bella – who took 2 weeks.

Doing so I caused myself more stress. I felt like a failure.

What I failed to realise was that – this was part of Ariana’s journey. Her journey of growing up.

And I probably stressed her out – fairly certain I was giving off vibes of stress-ness.

You know when you can feel someone’s energy?!

Anyway I am going off on a tangent.

Once I realised it was her journey that she would complete in her own time – we were onto a winner.

And interestingly she got there on her own. 

She just got it, it clicked.

She completed her journey in her own time – I didn’t need to push her there.

Our lives are a journey.

A series of moments, memories and lessons that we learn throughout our lives.

We will learn and live in so many ways 

But we can’t rush ourselves to complete our journey – take your time.

Journeys aren’t meant to be rushed.

Enjoy the view, take it slow. 

Get there in your own time.

FMF – loyal

So it appears I spoke too soon.

Apparently chicken pox have ears and heard me processing my joy at Ariana not having them..because she does now 🙄

I tell you what almost 6 weeks of essentially being housebound is enough to drive a person crazy.

Not only that my back problem has reared its ugly, painful head again.
As we speak I have spent the best part of 2 hours crying and shuffling around my kitchen, it seems to have gotten worse quicker this time too!

And trust me when you have poorly kids that you can’t pick up, it really sucks.

I will be so glad when our holiday comes around next week!

Vive la France!! 🇫🇷

So expect a few blog posts from our travels, I am super excited (mostly about Disneyland!)

It has been 4 years since we have been on a full on family holiday – so here’s hoping its a good one!

Watch this space!!

Alright to the task at hand



As usual I am joining in with kate and her linkup of lovely writers, for five minutes of free writing 😊

This weeks word – loyal

Ready, set, go

I am a fiercely loyal person.

It has its upsides and its downsides for sure.

There have many times in my life where I have stuck up for people who wouldn’t do the same for me – even those who have treated me badly.

Inevitably though today you will find people that have been hurt by the words of another.
People are imperfect and it will happen.

Sometimes it is intentional, other times it isn’t.
But that doesn’t make it hurt any less right?

Words are powerful and have the ability to harm or heal.

I work my hardest to use kind words.
To be there for my friends.
To be a steadfast friend.

To me loyalty is an important aspect of not only friendships but in family too.

I think without loyalty between one another it’s hard to have trust you know?

But what is also important to me is loyalty to Jehovah.
Because without Jehovah I don’t believe I would be where I am today.

Jehovah shows us loyal love, so why can’t I do the same?
After all he has given us?

Let’s all to remain loyal and steadfast
Even though the world around us appears to spiral further into turmoil.

Remain loyal to our friends
Remain loyal to family
Remain loyal to Jehovah